Big Summer Fun on a Small Budget

Cheap summer fun, free activities for kids, Summer funLast summer we went on two big trips with the family which was lots of fun but not cheap.  This year we wanted to keep the summer fun within a budget since we spent a lot on our spring vacation.  I thought about whether that would be difficult and realized it is completely doable.  I realized that having fun doesn’t always have to come with a big price tag and there are still many fun things to do with the kids.

One great resource is the local library.  They have all kinds of activities for kids of all ages.  There are craft sessions and visiting entertainers and even Mad Science demos.  They also have summer reading programs which encourage kids to read by giving them prizes.  Our library even carries passes for various museums in the area which make for an inexpensive day trip as long as you manage your kids’ expectations on food and souvenirs.  Some area stores even do free or inexpensive workshops for kids where they get to make or build something.  I know I’ve seen some at Home Depot or Michaels that intrigued my boys

Now that the weather is nice, there are also lots of options on free outdoor entertainment if you look for it.  I noticed that in our area (Princeton) there are events in the town or in the parks, such as musicians playing or movies being shown, etc.  I realized a good place to look is the free local paper that comes that I used to just toss into recycling.  Now I look at the calendar of events first.  Or sometimes we just go into town to get ice cream and we take a ball to play with in the adjoining field.  Simple fun and it works off the sugar!

The other great way to have fun with kids in the summer is to be social.  I love to arrange play dates because then the kids see friends and they keep busy.  Sometimes those situations even become a play date for the moms and everyone leaves happier.  We live in a community with a pool so we try to take full advantage of that and invite friends to join us.  It’s a nice way to cool off and get their energy out in a positive way.

So those are some of the things we are going to try this summer.  Hopefully we will find time to do a bit of reading and studying here and there too.  We also plan to make some trips to the Jersey shore to support the state and all those affected by Superstorm Sandy.  I’m sure I will have my moments of frustration trying to entertain the kids and I’m sure they will tell me they’re bored at times as well.  However, I think we have a pretty good plan and enough options for fun without breaking the bank!  Enjoy your summer!!!

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Dare to be Different

unique, daring, not fitting inI understand why being different requires ‘daring’.  Whether by design or by accident, when one leads a life that is different, there are many challenges that require strength of character to overcome.  I’m not even talking about leading a very dramatically different life.  Even the simple differences that set you apart from the so-called ‘norm’ can make you feel excluded or like you don’t fit in.  Many times there are random differences like someone who is single vs. married, or culturally different, or doing a different line of work, or families with kids vs. without.  People don’t mean to be mean or elitist but most people tend to flock to whatever or whoever is familiar.  So if you don’t fit in completely then you will feel out-of-place.  I guess that’s why people try to “keep up with the Jones’s” since it often becomes easier to play that game than to feel like the odd one out.

However, I think daring to be different is not a bad thing.  I think the world can’t be made up of all the same types of people who lead the same type of lives and buy the same types of things.  First of all it is not possible given different financial circumstances, but it would also be very boring.  I think those who dare to be different challenge the rest to dare to accept them.  They put people to the test to see if they are willing to see beyond their society’s cookie cutter images.  If they do then sometimes it will broaden their thinking and tolerance and teach them more about people and the world.  If they don’t, then that’s okay and those people may not have the openness to accept.

We are social beings and therefore most of us do long for acceptance.  So of course it can be hard not being part of a group or a pack.  That setting provides security but it can also hold us back.  Maybe it is nice to meet all types of different people who don’t fit in to any one group but are tied by the thread of friendship and acceptance.  Often those people make your life richer and make your mind more open.  Whether it’s by choice or by God’s will, I salute all those who dare to be different and I hope my children will feel that way too!

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Is ‘Man of Steel’ for Kids?

man_of_steelThis weekend we went to see the latest superhero blockbuster ‘Man of Steel’.  Of course my kids, ages 10 and 8, were the most excited to go despite the PG-13 rating.  So my husband and I had to do a little research and watch as many trailers as possible to make the appropriate parental call.  In the end, we did take them since they are big Superman fans and they have seen quite a few other action flicks.

I definitely thought this was a darker and more violent version of the Superman stories but I didn’t come out of there feeling like an irresponsible parent for taking the kids.  There was a great deal of action and buildings blowing up when Superman is fighting Zod but it was reminiscent of ‘Transformers’.  My kids had seen those movies and didn’t seem too disturbed since there weren’t really any humans getting hurt, it was mainly robots and this time it was an alien superhero and alien villain.  I don’t want to expose my kids to so much violence that they either start being violent, or that they become numb to it.  However, I don’t think that is happening with these types of movies since they don’t personally relate to these super-beings or super-robots.  They have a much more disturbed reaction when they see a regular person physically hurt or emotionally upset.

So beside the violence, there are some scenes that might disturb a child. (Small spoiler alert- nothing major) There is a birthing scene (not that you see anything) which may bring up some questions and then some creepy skeletal images when Clark gets X-ray vision.  Though, as a mom who loves to lecture my kids on things, I did find some good teaching points in the story.  I was able to alert my kids to Clark Kent’s strength of character, his willpower to do good even when it is hard, and also mention how he dealt with bullies!  So I think the inherent goodness of the character helped balance out all the fighting and exploding.  Oh….and I almost forgot to mention that the eye-candy is great for the moms too!

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Family Adventure to Comic-Con

comicComic-Con was always something I heard about but never thought to go to until this year.  I saw an ad for tickets and it suddenly occurred to me….why not?  I mean it is all about sci-fi, superheroes, fantasy, and creativity which are things that my husband, my kids and I all love.  We weren’t sure if there would be anything going on that would be inappropriate for the kids to see so I did a little research on-line and off we went.  My cousin came with us too since all these things are totally up her alley too.

It was a wonderful day for our family and a new little adventure that my kids feel should be an annual event.  I’m not sure about that but it was definitely worth going this time.  Both of them dressed up, one as Superman and the other as Iron Man.  They took pictures with all kinds of characters from Star Wars, Superheroes, and other comic characters.  They even got to do some Jedi training with light sabers and shoot at Storm Troopers.  My older son is into creating his own comic books so it was great for him to see real artists and writers in action.  They got to have caricatures of themselves drawn which served as great souvenirs.

We even had a lot of star sightings.  Though I wasn’t about to pay $30-40 for autographs or pictures with the stars, we were still happy to see them up close.  My boys even went and chatted with Brandon Routh (Superman) and shook his hand.  They were pretty thrilled about that.  My cousin and I were pretty giddy about our sightings of actors from our shows/movies like Arrow, Buffy, GI Joe, Hulk, Hercules, etc.  We even saw our teen heart-throb Andrew McCarthy, though we couldn’t figure out what his movies had to do with Comic-Con.

It was a lot more kid-friendly than I expected but still cool enough for adults.  There were plenty of Trekkies, Game of Thrones and Dexter lovers too.  The biggest following had to be for The Walking Dead and Dr. Who which are both shows I do not watch.  But I was still intrigued and found a bit of curiosity brewing for these shows that had people so obsessed.  It was a good day overall and we even got to have some good Philly cheese steaks across the street.  It was nice to see all the so-called geeky/nerdy things we enjoyed since childhood were now cool and the big money-makers.  So I would definitely recommend going if your kids are into these kinds of things and even more if you enjoy it yourself!

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A Mother’s Thanks

Mother, child, children, love, maternal, mother's dayI’m thankful for the opportunity and challenge of being a mother.  I’m thankful that I grew up with a loving mother and that I have a chance to pay it forward.  I’m glad I get to feel the love of my children and shower them back with unconditional love.  I am able to mold them into the vision of perfection that I have in my mind while making allowances for their personalities and unique abilities.  I hope that my shortcomings do not hold us back from that goal.   I want them to be good people with faith in God and love for humanity.  I want them to work hard and play hard and make their mark on the world.  I want them to experience love and have good health.  I want them to be safe but not be afraid to take calculated risks in life.  I want them to be so much more than I am but I need to give them a foundation of good values, love and security.  This is my first challenge as a mother and my second and hardest is to be able to let them go as they grow and find themselves and then love the person they grow into.  I miss my cuddly babies but I enjoy my little boys with all their stories and experiences.  I’m sure I’ll miss that too as they become detached teens but I’ll love seeing them blossom and have adventures. Each age has its struggles and joys but  I’ll do my best and give them my love so they know there is always a safe haven with mom.  I’m sure we will hit some bumps along the way since I’m not perfect, but hopefully those won’t be serious.  After all, there needs to be something about childhood to complain about to a therapist!

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Sad

What do you do when you’re feeling down?

Don’t feel like going about the town.

Don’t want to lift your head from the bed,

Don’t want to do anything.

Do you give in?

Do you cry and ask Why?

Or do you buck up and keep going?

Keep the positive juices flowing.

Get up and feel strong,

Don’t worry about what’s wrong.

The troubles will go away

Tomorrow, if not today….

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What Do You Tell Your Kids About This Scary World?

protect kidsI was not ready when my son came home from first grade telling me he learned about the 9/11 attacks and the wars going on.  I wanted to shelter my kids from thoughts of such evil in the world for a bit longer but his teacher felt it appropriate to talk about it and have them make cards for soldiers.  It was a nice gesture but I still felt they were too young.  Recently then, I had to figure out how to discuss the Newtown school shooting with my elementary school aged kids.  After all that, this week has been all about the Boston bombings where my kids know their uncle and aunt live.  All of this hits too close to home, especially if you take into account shootings at a Sikh temple (our religion) and a movie theater (our favorite past-time).  So how does one explain this all to young children?

Well, my kids are old enough to understand the facts about what is going on but I don’t think they really comprehend it.  My guess is that they either equate it to the fictional violence they see in movies where superheroes or secret agents save the day.  Or, I think they may be just blocking it out of their minds because the thoughts are too scary.  It may even be a bit of both.  I just feel that my duty as a parent is to make sure I’m there for them to talk about it and to make sure that they know we will try to keep them safe and secure.

I’m glad their fantasies include superheroes or larger than life secret agents because I think it is important to believe that good wins out over evil.  I honestly do believe in that too.  I don’t think someone in a cape with super-strength will save us but I think that many heroes are born out of these situations.  All our law enforcement agents rally and put their lives on the line while many regular citizens go out of their way to help one another.  We have seen this in the past and we saw it again this week after the Boston bombings.  I made sure to remind my boys that lots of good people went to help victims no matter how tired or scared they were.  I need them to focus on the good and the kindness in this world even though they are aware that there is some evil out there as well.

No one can control everything but as parents we try to be vigilant and protect our children as much as possible.  Sadly, we can’t always protect them from thoughts and fears and all this violence breeds more fear.  I think exposing them to stories of good deeds and nice things helps combat that.  The most important thing I feel is to make sure they know they are loved and have a sense of security at home.  That way at least home and family are a sanctuary from scary things.  So, give your kids a hug and tell them you love them.  It’s a simple win over all the fear and evil in the world!

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The New India

India, New India, development, progress, india tourismWhen I was growing up, India, the country of my heritage was considered a third world country.  The India that my kids are growing up seeing is a whole different place, however.  So much has changed in a few decades.  I was really impressed by most of the new developments that I noticed during my recent trip.

We still took anti-Malaria drugs and only drank bottled water while we were there but most other things felt similar to the west.  There were American restaurants, products and shops everywhere.  The fashion trends were more parallel than in the past.  There was tons of construction of new malls, cineplexes, and highways.  With the increase in foreign businesses and tourism, many things catered to more than just the locals.  It was really impressive to see the massive growth in such a short time.  After all, India only gained independence from the British in 1947.  After years of oppression and now a partitioned country as well, they struggled to get back on their feet.

Many people in the past, like my parents, had left India to gain better opportunities in the US.  This was the land of growth and opportunity.  I still believe it is but now with all the globalization and changes in India, that has become a land of opportunity as well.  Many more recent immigrants from India are actually choosing to move back.  For people like my parents, this is not an option since they are now more American than Indian and lived here for much longer than in India.  However, for many new immigrants who came purely for job opportunities, moving back to family and their home sounds great if the jobs are similar.

There are still a lot of problems in India too, as with any country.  Even though there are people with way too much money, there is rampant poverty as well.   There is also a lot of corruption and bribery that goes on at every level.  Bribing policeman and government officials seems to be a regular part of doing business.  Where people can be bought like that, rules and regulations are often bypassed leading to dangerous outcomes.  This is when we hear about buildings collapsing because the builders got away with using poor materials or adding unauthorized floors.

I was also disappointed in the lack of community feeling and responsibility.  Each person, rich or poor, is only concerned with their own family and not what is going on around them.  Or, there are some who recognize issues but don’t make changes because they feel like their changes wouldn’t make a difference in the larger problem.  With such a large population of talent and resources, there is so much potential if people had more of an attitude of working together for the benefit of the community and country.  Instead I heard of politicians selling public lands to grease their own pockets.  There was also no sense of concern for the environment but I guess it has taken the West a long time to change on that front as well.

I guess every country goes through growing pains and has downfalls after successes.  We have seen plenty of that in the US as well.  Though, I still consider myself a proud American at heart, I was very happy to see all the progress in the country of my heritage and extended family.  I was proud to take my kids there and show them what they come from.  It also felt nice that they have the impression to pass on to their friends that India is a country of riches and luxury.  That is quite a change from the India we visited as kids.  Regardless of the monetary changes though, I was happy to see that a lot of the cultural and family values haven’t faded too much.  My kids received the same warm welcome and love that I used to get and I’m sure they would love to visit again!

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Rekindling Relationships

reconnecting, relationships, family, loveI recently visited my extended family in India after many years and it made me realize how important it is to rekindle relationships with loved ones.  Especially with family, you can easily take relationships for granted, feeling like they will always be there.  However, relationships of any type require effort and attention to flourish.  You may continue to be related by blood and maybe some sense of duty but without the effort, the feelings will fade.

This is why I wanted to make sure that I took my husband and sons to visit the relatives we had not seen in over 5 years.  When we last visited, my boys were quite young and though they had a great time, they do not remember that trip.  Some friends here have a surprised reaction that I value these connections with cousins, aunts and uncles who I only saw every few years at best.  I guess we all connected well and shared enough love and memories that sustained us during the absence.  I wanted my kids to enjoy the same feelings and get a chance to build their own connections.  I think we succeeded.

Whether it be with friends or family, we should make the effort to reconnect now and then.  I do believe that when you have a strong relationship with someone you can reconnect easily even when you don’t speak or meet regularly.  However, if there has been a long disconnect, we should try to send a note, talk, or visit.  This serves to remind both parties that the relationship is still important and has not dwindled.  This communication will work to strengthen the bond.  Of course life is busy and with so many people in our lives it is hard to regularly communicate with all but now and again we should get in touch.  In the meantime, social media helps us connect on a superficial level!

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Oscars 2013

Academy awards, oscar night, Argo, Lincoln, Last night was my favorite awards show, the Oscars.  I love the Hollywood glamour, the excitement, and of course the celebration of the best movies and artists of the year.  Last night did not disappoint.  Though I didn’t know much about the host, Seth MacFarlane, I was pretty impressed.  He could sing, dance, tell jokes, and he wasn’t bad to look at either.  I know some people complained that his humor took things too far but what did people expect from the guy who made Ted and Family Guy.  I wasn’t thrilled with all of it either but overall he kept us interested.

The theme celebrated music in movies and that was fun to watch because it felt like a Broadway musical at times.  It was impressive to see actors sing and dance so well.  For instance, I did not know that Charlize Theron was such a good dancer.  The group numbers from Les Miserables and Chicago were very good as well and Adele was amazing as usual.

Everyone looked amazing on the red carpet as well.  Some of my favorite gowns were worn by Jennifer Lawrence, Jennifer Garner, Zoe Saldana, and Naomi Watts.  Some of these looks were delicate and princess-like while others were edgy and futuristic.  They were all done well.  A couple of looks that I did not like were Helena Bonham Carter’s who loves to dress bizarrely and Kristen Stewart who looked sloppy.  As for the men, I thought Hugh Jackman looked great sporting a beard and wearing a Tom Ford tuxedo.  I noticed many of the men kept beards last night and they all looked very handsome.

As for the actual awards, Life of Pi took more awards than I expected and even the best director went to Ang Lee.  I expected Steven Spielberg to take that honor.  The best lead actor and supporting actor went to Daniel Day Lewis and Christoph Waltz, both of whom gave great speeches.  Supporting actress Oscar went to Anne Hathaway as most people expected, for her intense role as Fantine.  Jennifer Lawrence won the Oscar for best actress which was great barring her tripping on the way to the stage.  I guess that lovely gown had its drawbacks.  Argo won best picture and I do think it deserved that honor.  It was up against some amazing films but that one had emotion and also kept you on the edge of your seat.  I know  the Oscars don’t generally go to the movies with the widest appeal but this time I think it did.  Lincoln was incredible but some people thought it was a bit long and slow.  Life of Pi had a fantasy appeal that I enjoyed but it would be an unusual choice.  Silver Linings Playbook was a great film as well but I don’t think it had the big screen draw of Argo.  Django Unchained was one of Tarrentino’s best in my opinion but his style is too over the top for the Academy it seems.  I didn’t watch the other nominees yet but loved all the nominated movies so far!  2013 seems like it is going to be full of superhero sequels and blockbusters so let’s see what Oscar-worthy films sneak in for next year’s awards.

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