Recently, I lost a friend to cancer and it really shook me up. I was sad that he’s gone and I won’t ever get to see him again. But, I was also really upset that many, many months had gone by and we hadn’t spoken and then it was too late. I knew he was undergoing treatment but he told me that he had a lot more time even if the treatment failed. So, as many of us do, I got caught up in day-to-day issues of life and had not spoken to him.
Well, after this tragedy, it made me realize that I really shouldn’t take life and friends for granted and I should reach out a little more often. I used to be a social butterfly when I was younger but then I think I became socially lazy in the last decade and also much busier with family. Sometimes, it just feels like too much work to call people and make plans after a week of taking care of kids while my husband is traveling. I’d rather just go to a movie, or roam around in a mall and relax. However, I have realized that I do need friends and people in my life other than immediate family and that means putting in some effort. Many of my friendships have a strong foundation because of past history but they still need some occasional nurturing if they are going to live on.
It is hard to keep up with people when many live at a distance or lead very different lives. Though I still think it is important to at least shoot an email or make a call every now and then to see how they are doing. People may be going through a crisis and one can’t assume that no news is good news. Even if nothing is wrong, as a friend, you should know about the joys in your friends’ lives as well and share it with them.
I’m definitely taking this sad lesson to heart and going to try to do better from now on. I really don’t like calling people much but I’ll do it sometimes or at least send and email. I want to teach my kids that it is important to have friendships and to nurture those relationships too. I guess this is my mid-year resolution so let’s see how long I can hold to it. Life is short, don’t waste it…